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You may need to stockpile Heinz ketchup.

(Via Hot Air)  You know, when Heinz ketchup became (bizarrely enough) a minor issue during the 2004 campaign I sneered wholeheartedly at the idea of switching brands just because the stuff was tenuously maybe-linked to the Democrats.  Politics was one thing; my freaking ketchup was quite another. So I feel that I am in a position to fulminate about the fact that Heinz is about to cut the salt content of their ketchup in order to satisfy the ninnies* at Bloomberg’s National Salt Reduction Initiative.

For the first time in 40 years, Heinz ketchup is changing its famous recipe — by lowering the salt content in an effort to appeal to more health-conscious consumers, the company said yesterday.

Company officials have taste tested the new blend and believe it will be as popular as their old recipe, which has a 60 percent share of the ketchup market.

But Heinz fans fear that the company may be messing with perfection and that the switch could wind up a flavor debacle equal to the infamous rollout of New Coke.

I fully expect that the pushback on this will be what I will christen a Green Eggs and Ham defense: “How will you know that you’ll hate it before you even try it?”  To which I reply, “Who gave you permission to restrict my life choices as if I was a four-year- old?”  If I want low-sodium ketchup, I’ll buy some.  If not buying low-sodium ketchup interferes with your health care rationing scheme, well, I never gave you permission to impose that on me, either.

Anyway, you have until the summer to stock up on this stuff; it looks like it’ll last for a year in storage, which should hopefully be long enough for Heinz to notice that they aren’t selling as much ketchup as they used to.

Moe Lane

*I originally misspelled this as ‘nannies’… and then I realized that, no, it works this way too.

Crossposted to Moe Lane.

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