« BACK  |  PRINT

RS

FRONT PAGE CONTRIBUTOR

Bro-Choice: Founders of The People’s Democracy of Soulless Fornication (PDSF)

Touching Honesty.

I Got's Your Choice Right Here, Baby!

I Got’s Your Choice Right Here, Baby!


There’s a certain type of man who goes all-out on behalf of abortion rights; the type of guy who’s Bro-Choice. The type of person who needs a musical expression that shows the rest of the world what is really inside his soul. So here goes. It’s quite catchy, in a sadistic sort of a way.

Ah, the wonderful PUA community. They’re out there and they’re Bro-Choice. The strength of sentiment varies. It begins with abortion is understandable in some cases. It’s a classic “camel’s nose under the tent” technique that can later be extended without loss of generality. Here’s a “Conservative, Tradititionalist Pro-Choice” take presented on Return of Kings.

I came to realize that, while I still saw some value in the traditionalist views I’d held, many humans were not willing or able to live in accordance with that model. It became clear, in fact, that many humans were actually quite inept at any kind of family formation, and perhaps shouldn’t bother with it at all.

So obviously if the parenting skills are lacking, you solve society’s little problem by sucking it’s head to pieces with a vacuum. How was it the Freakonomics guys described it? Pre-Crime. That’s it. Roe v. Wade prevented crime by killing people. It makes about as much sense as fornication for virginity. But then again, soul-sucked fornication is the entire point of the Bro-Choice Movement. Gotta’ scratch the old itch somehow…

Here we get another awful set of justifications for the abortion from the PUAs.

There are many great reasons for men to support abortion, but here are a few of the main reasons I stand with Planned Parenthood and pro-choice feminists:
1. Abortion is a great way to reduce the minority population
2. Abortion is great way to reduce the number of Democrats
3. Abortion is a great way to please the Lord.
4. Abortion saves men from having to transfer wealth to sluts.
5. Abortion promotes educational opportunities and a workforce dedicated to gender diversity.
6. Only a little over 18,000 fully-formed babies are chopped up and sucked out of the womb each year in the United States.

This all amounts to evil; even if it was written tongue-in-cheek.* I’ve addressed point 1 extensively here. Point two sounds like a good argument in favor of nuclear war. Three should never be written unless you worship a different lord than I do**. Point four could be assuaged by the simple expedient of either practicing some manly restraint or putting a latex sock on the trouser snake. If you buy number five than you are about as necessary in her life as a fish supposedly finds a bicycle*** and point six is something that a little Lean Six Sigma and a judicious application of the Five S’s could rapidly ramp up from LRIP to FRP.

So the logic could fertilize a field of Cascade Hops. Then what does it all come down to? Lionel Hampton could have done tole ya. It all comes down to the vibes.

Your sex life is at stake. Can you think of anything that kills the vibe faster than a woman fearing a back-alley abortion? Making abortion essentially inaccessible in Texas will add an anxiety to sex that will drastically undercut its joys. And don’t be surprised if casual sex outside of relationships becomes far more difficult to come by.

Yes indeed. For all the angst and pixel-staining The Man-O-Sphere goes through over feminism, they are a true force multiplier for every Wendy Davis out there fighting a war on reproduction. These men aren’t worthy of the junk that hangs between their legs. I may have my numerous problems, but I’m sure thankful to the Lord that being Bro-Choice isn’t one of them. I’d rather live in America than the People’s Democracy of Soulless Fornication.

*-Or tongue anywhere else for that matter.

**- The British Satanists have something the Bro-Choicers lack. Standards.

***- But when did that ever stand in the way of taking care of some ‘bidness over at the $19.99 Hotel?

Get Alerts