FRONT PAGE CONTRIBUTOR
Mail Bag: Cancel Your Own Goram Subscription
The Left loves sending us little love letters like this to show that they care:
Subject: unsubscribe me
Date: February 26, 2014 at 8:38:11 PM MST
To: “email@example.com” <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Just to set you straight. I think your choice of names (I. e. Red State) is well chosen. You are clearly ‘flaming idiots’ who rely exclusively on Fox News and Rush Limbaugh for its knowledge. As such you are clear examples that Barnum was right….you can fool some of the people all of the time.
Imagine how you are going to feel when you realize you have avoided comprehensive knowledge in favor of ostrich ignorance. If you weren’t so dangerous to a civilized society you would be pitied
Now, if this person truly cared about unsubscribing (or had a modicum of brain power), he would note the following at the bottom of each edition of the Morning Briefing:
Were you forwarded this edition of the RedState Morning Briefing? Get your own free subscription by clicking here.
This email was sent to [person’s e-mail] because this address is signed up to receive RedState Morning Briefing. To unsubscribe or to update your email delivery preferences,click to edit your account settings.
So, in the words of the late, great William F. Buckley, “Cancel your own [goram] subscription!”
In all, I’d give this e-mail a 6 out of 10. The accusations that we rely solely on Fox News and Rush Limbaugh are really rather cliched and boilerplate Liberal stuff, and I could say the same about the declaration that he will pity us. John gets positive marks for his ranting, but lacks the spelling and glaring punctuation letters that might have made this more amusing, even though he could learn how to use periods, ellipsis, and quotation marks. He could also use a refresher on his comma rules. He also should know that P.T. Barnum never said the quote he attributed to the great ringmaster. If it can be attributed to anyone, it is probably Abraham Lincoln, although whether he actually said it is a matter of dispute. John is probably thinking the quote, “There’s a sucker born every minute,” which is often attributed to Barnum, even if it is, again, a matter of dispute if he actually said it. However, this requires greater levels of thought and research skills than your average lefty troll can muster. One extra point is awarded for the chance to make a William F. Buckley reference.
A decent e-mail all around, but I’ve seen better.