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Brian Beutler’s Modest, Indecent Proposal: Murder Hillary To Bypass The Constitution

It has always been only 90% joking when we conservatives have said the committed left would stop at nothing to get Obama a third term, if not more. It’s a riff on their rabid, cult-like dedication. A play on their pious devotion. A commentary on just how committed they are. Or perhaps how badly they need to be committed.

So it is only 10 percent surprising that we read with interest today Brian Beutler’s oh so precious paean to the pagan man god’s political future, posted at the (New!) New Republic. And it begins with a hilarious title: “A Modest Proposal: Barack Obama Should Be Hillary Clinton’s Running Mate”.

There is some terrific hilarity sprinkled throughout, but let’s go right for the assassination.

Here’s the money:

I’ll grant that if Democrats nominate Barack Obama to be their vice presidential candidate next year, it would be somewhat controversial. But here Democrats can borrow tactically from the literal-minded conservatives who have seized on syntactic oddities to unravel Obama’s domestic agenda. As a purely textual matter, the Constitution merely prohibits Obama from being elected to a third term. It doesn’t necessarily prohibit him from actually being president again, should Hillary Clinton no longer be able to serve

It’s best if you “hear” that last bit in the voice of someone hiring a hitman. “Be a real shame if something happened to her, am I right?” It also helps to picture him thinking up the “from being elected” bit with Mr. Burns hair and steepled fingers, perhaps while glaring down at a picture of Hillary and a partially charred copy of the Constitution.

Oh, and um, speaking of that old thing. Beutler’s whole idea misses a pretty big point. The last sentence of the 12th amendment reads “But no person constitutionally ineligible to the office of President shall be eligible to that of Vice-President of the United States.” Being that he’s Keyn… Kidding! He’s ineligible because he can’t serve a third term. Therefore he is also ineligible to serve as the Vice President under the 12th Amendment.

But hey, chin up Brian. Hillary still might die. I mean what is she, like, 100 years old?

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