As every single person on this earth knows, this week Barack Obama presented what he referred to as his “closing argument” and which is more aptly referred to as an indoctrination infomercial. Only unlike other infomercials, this was prime time, international, and mandatory. Every channel shall display the Obama, every TV shall bow, every world series recess.

Obama’s eerie half hour, part American Idol contestant “package”, part get rich quick seminar (If you vote now we’ll throw in no mortgage payments for ONE FULL YEAR!!!) is not only a perfect summary of the type of campaign the One has waged, it’s a delightful preview into what his four years would look like … namely, an episode of Extreme Makeover: Nation Edition, complete with tears from beginning to end.

If Barack Obama wins on Tuesday, the world will indeed change as promised. We’ll be swimming in elected Democrats. We’ll have card check legislation to enforce a unionocracy across the land, which will in turn dump garbage truck loads of small denomination cash into democratic campaigns. Meaning even more elected democrats in which to swim. We’ll have the Chosen One issuing edicts from atop his mountain of mandate. What would that world look like? I’m glad you asked: