Condoleeza Rice? What ever. Rob Portman? Yawn-a-roo. Loni Anderson in her prime? Eh, I’ll get back to you…

All I Want for Christmas is for Mitt Romney to pick a conservative. Who knows how to fight. And who knows how to win.

Let’s face it: Mitt Romney is connecting with voters in much the same way the sewer connects to your house: You kinda have to have it, or there’s gonna be crap everywhere. We will vote for the Mittster –maybe even stump for him– because we must. We literally have no choice.

The righteous wrath of the Tea Party will put Governor Romney in the White House. It won’t be Karl Rove, it won’t be Matt Drudge and all of his moles working in the Romney war-room. It won’t be Peggy Noonan writing another oh-so-velvety-smooth column in the Wall Street Journal that puts Romney in the Oval Office.

It will be the American People who will rise up on Election day, in a landslide that hasn’t been seen for 32 years, that will put Mitt’s hand on the bible on a cold day in January at the West Front of the United States Capitol.

There will be fury --fury!– expressed on Election Day. There will be a stampede of Patriots at dawn to inundate the polls– with a tidal wave of heretofore unseen emotion –emotion that will erase the horrible, unspeakable mistake the electorate made four short years ago.

How am I so sure? What is the tap-root of my confidence?

At every opportunity since 2008, when the  America People have had a chance to reverse course, or had a moment to express their utter horror of the Obama nightmare, they’ve reached into their voting booths, and cried out “No More!”

Think about it; call it the Tea Party Roll Call:

Scott Brown. Bob McDonnell. Chris Cristie. Nancy Pelosi and the entire congress in 2010. Nearly 800 state legislators, unknowable local elections. Madison and the recalls of the Wisconsin senate, and of Governor Walker. Richard Murdoch. At every turn, the Tea Party has arisen, mobilized, marched, and volunteered. They’ve canvassed, they’ve phone-banked, they’ve walked the precincts, they’ve raised millions of dollars.

They’ve saved America. The Tea Party –and ONLY the Tea Party– has stood between Obama, and the certain death of our Republic.

And I am NOT kidding.

Therefore, it sure would be nice for the Mittster to throw us a bone.

Pick a Fighter, Governor Romney. And pick a CONSERVATIVE.