It turns out that I was completely wrong to doubt that Barack Obama would change the way things are done in Washington. I should have seen the signs earlier: but when Barack funneled $1 mil of taxpayer money to the hospital where his wife works after they gave her a substantial raise, I thought it was merely a bold, one time move - nothing more nor less than a publicity stunt.
Alas, my hard and cynical heart prevented me from seeing the awesome truth. It turns out that Barack Obama really is changing the way things are done in Washington. We now have definitive proof that Obama is committed to this plan of action, and he will change the culture in Washington or die trying. Behold the new thing Obama has wrought - if you are a large corporation or special interest group and you donate large sums of money to either Obama's Presidential Campaign or his joint checking account, he will make sure that you are first in line at the feeding trough of taxpayer money.
What a revolutionary way to run the government. Clearly, it took a man of Obama's vision, moral character and principle, to devise this brand new way of doing things. As an average American citizen, my faith in government is restored, reinvigorated by the hope that one day, if I have millions of dollars, I can give some of it to Obama in exchange for an even larger return of money from American taxpayers. Thank you, Barack, for helping me to see the light.
Now all we need is a brand new and catchy marketing slogan to describe this brand new and revolutionary process. Let's see, I'm never very good with these things... how about, "Pay for play"? Or maybe "Special interest group pandering"? Or maybe we could call it something that really pops, something totally and completely fresh, like "Corruption"?
I don't know what we'll call it in the end, but I do know that my faith in Government is restored. Thank you, Barack Obama. I'm sorry I ever doubted you.