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What Exactly Is a Toure?

I awoke from my slumber or ignorance or avoidance of MSNBC a little while ago and started watching “The Cycle.” If any reader here wants a good laugh, then I wholeheartedly suggest you watch this mindless liberal drivel that is supposed to pass for political discourse. There are four panelists, one of whom is a woman named Krystal Ball. According to her biography, she is a consultant within the Democratic Party in Virginia. I know in 2010 she ran for a House seat and lost. During that campaign, pictures surfaced of her wearing a dildo on her head at a party which would seem appropriate since the inflection in her voice sounds as if she is a retired porn star. In a sad attempt to even out the panel, they have somewhat conservative columnist S.E. Cupp along with some other white guy that they seem to rotate in and out depending upon availability. No matter who it is, their collective intelligence quotient falls somewhere below 90 anyway. But, the one panelist who caught my eye is this thing called Toure. Not knowing what a Toure was, I decided to look him up and read about his claim to fame besides being a co-host on “The Cycle.”

Supposedly, he is the heir apparent to Al “Where Did My Weight Go?” Sharpton and Jesse “Rhymin’ Simon” Jackson as the new voice of black America. He made it to MSNBC by way of “Rolling Stone” magazine and, I understand, some other publications like “Essense” and on ESPN. He was also on MTV for a bit which is why he is also apparently MSNBC’s resident expert on all things cultural. I am not sure whether he was on MTV when they actually played music Incidentally (as an aside), has anyone seen music on MTV lately other than the obligatory hip-hop or rap artist?

It appears that Toure, or Toure Neblett, was born and raised in an integrated neighborhood outside Boston and that his family must have been well off since they could afford a private education for this poor downtrodden modern black man being kept down by the man. In fact, it wasn’t just any private education but one at the prestigious Milton Academy which has produced Governors and Nobel laureates. It costs about $37,500 a year to send your kid to this school. Thus, to start off, Toure is not your average run of the mill African-American. He then attended Emory University in Georgia, an almost all white school also, like Milton Academy. There, one is not sure of his major but we do know that after reading the autobiography of Malcolm X, he changed his major to African-American Studies, one of those majors that really prepares you for future employment at MSNBC and, well…MSNBC. While there, there are stories that he got along quite well with his white dorm mates- so well that he insisted that he was French, not really a privileged black kid from the Boston suburbs. He founded a black nationalist newspaper- “Fire This Time (real revolutionary). This publication was known for three things: anti-Semitism, black supremacy (a/k/a reverse racism) and conspiracy theories a la “the man is keeping us down by putting crack in our neighborhoods.” One of his heroes was Frances Cress Welsing, best known for her black supremacist theory known as “the melanin theory.” Then while at Emory, he used a hoaxed hate crime allegation in order to extract some demands from the university. Luckily for Emory, Toure then dropped out and took up an internship at the increasingly inconsequential magazine, “Rolling Stone.” There, he became a music journalist until he was let go only to be rehired later.

Somewhere along the line, Toure became a de facto spokesman for all things cultural and all things black. And boy, is he an exclusively black spokesman. In fact, he is so black that he sees race in everything and by everything, I mean everything. It is quite possible that he even takes offense to the blackberry tree especially since the berry may appear purple to many. I believe, besides his 9/11 truther beliefs which are well-documented, that it would be wise to now recount some of Toure’s greatest insights into blackness and American culture. And this list is by no means exhaustive of the stupidity of Toure.

In September 2011, as the US remembered the tenth anniversary of a terrorist attack, Toure decried these trips down memory lane and said they were indicative of an anti-Islam mindset in the country. Let us not forget his great ability to take advantage of the Trayvonn Martin incident and his demonization of George Zimmerman. Somewhere along the line, he came to view Skittles as a demon also. The theory went that poor Trayvonn was just passing through the neighborhood after getting some Skittles and a Coke. Sales of Skittles increased after this event. To Toure, therefore, the makers of Skittles were making a profit off the death of an “innocent black kid” and, by extension, they too were racist. Having settled that mystery, there were bigger fish to fry since his hero, Barack Obama, was running for reelection against Mitt Romney. Toure accused Romney of “niggerizing” the campaign and suggesting that Romney wanted to get booed while addressing the NAACP in order to drum up support and sympathy from the white, racist Republicans. Not to be outdone, he then characterized Herman Cain as a “minstrel.” He claimed that if you put a bunch of white conservatives together in the same room, the only result is some alternate reality. Oh…it is also racist to interrupt Obama during a press conference to ask a question. Of course, it goes without saying that Toure is constantly on the lookout for racial code words from whites, conservatives, and Republicans.

In other areas, he claims that if black kids were killed in Newtown, Connecticut that it would be somewhat less of a tragedy and we would not be talking about guns at all. Voting laws, of course, are racist as is Dr. Ben Carson because he is a black man who does not talk or act like the black man that Toure has in his mind. He was even thankful for abortions since apparently one of his former flames had become pregnant and had an abortion with his blessing. His point is that without abortion as an option of convenience, then Toure’s career would have likely taken another path and God forbid, he may never have had the chance to be on MSNBC. He also claims that the demise of disco in the 1970s and early 1980s was both homophobic and racist and he could not understand why white Americans at the time had grown tired of the endless coverage of the death of Michael Jackson. To Toure, this had to have been racially motivated since Jackson was a sort of white/sort of black artist. And to let Toure in on a secret, disco died because it sucked.

Toure represents the worst kind of liberal in two respects. First, he upholds a liberal ideology of the most extreme kind and one that in no way can be gleaned from his past. He was not the object of racial or ethnic discrimination and, in fact, seems to have enjoyed a rather easy go of it. There were no food stamps growing up, no “humble beginnings”, no one-room school houses, etc. He went to a private school that cost $35 thousand a year and churned out Nobel laureates and Governors…and unfortunately, a Toure. He went to an well-respected university where, truth be told, his private education did not translate into collegiate success. Hence, other than reading a book about the life of Malcolm X, one has to question where his liberal ideology comes from. It must have been one hell of a book!

Secondly, he sees race in everything. This is a person, who like a certain president we all know, wrote a book on what it is like to be black at a relatively young age before they have clearly enjoyed or suffered all life has to offer. Granted, Obama actually graduated college before the University of Chicago offered him his ghost job as constitutional law professor as a means to write his book whereas Toure dropped out of college to become an intern and then occasional writer for “Rolling Stone.”

Blacks may have suffered discrimination, prejudice and racism of the most extreme kind and many ma possibility suffer the same, but certainly not Toure. Perhaps the best characterization of Toure comes from a black man himself. Bryce Watkins is a professor at Syracuse University and is known for his sometimes racial incendiary remarks and views. He had a well-publicized running feud with Bill O’Reilly at Fox at one time. But, Watkins had this to say about Toure: “Toure of MSNBC is the man who has every intelligent blak person wondering why he’s on TV, myself included. There are no credetials in his background which lead you to believe that he should be defining the direction of national thought on serious political issues.” In short, “shut up and go back to Boston.” Thankfully, no one of any intelligence really watches MSNBC.

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