Ok, folks this is one of those instances where you only need four words to say it:
Sarah Palin won't be appearing on Oprah's show until after the campaign is over, according to Drudge and Oprah.
I'M SHOCKED! JUST SHOCKED!
I haven't been this surprised since I heard Mayor Daley say that there wouldn't be any dissent about the nominee during the DNC Convention. I haven't been this surprised since Reese's made the shocking decision to put chocolate and peanut butter together in a candy coating. I haven't been this surprised since Hulk Hogan beat the Iron Sheik and Captain Lou Albano showed up in a Cyndi Lauper video, and Rowdy Roddy Piper started a fashion trend for men who like to wear skirts. I haven't been this surprised since this morning, when the sun rose in the East.
I haven't been this surprised since 2001. I am standing here beside myself!