FRONT PAGE CONTRIBUTOR
Breaking: Bush to permit offshore oil drilling.
Your turn, Congress.
WASHINGTON — President Bush will lift an executive ban on offshore oil drilling, although new oil exploration on the Outer Continental Shelf will remain off limits until Congress also takes action.
The president will make a Rose Garden statement on Monday, where he is expected to announce his lifting of the ban.
But by all means, ye Democratic legislators: take your time. Maybe you’ll get lucky, and wake up tomorrow in an alternate universe where 75% of the population doesn’t favor offshore drilling. And where you all have ponies! All of you always wanted ponies.
Well, who wouldn’t?