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Here’s the Al Gore Masseuse police report.

Fun game for your morning: see how far you get into this report before you develop this sudden and burning need to go find a rock, and throw it at Al Gore.  I personally made it to page 13.

Background, for those unaware of the story: it’s alleged – I want to make that clear; alleged – that back in 2006 Gore attempted to force sexual favors from a on-call Portland, Oregon masseuse.  On the one hand, there are legitimate questions about why the woman didn’t press charges at the time, didn’t pursue a civil case later, and is only now breaking the story with the National Enquirer*: on the other hand… that report up there is alarming.  It even alarmed Gawker, which takes skill. I personally had to read it in stages.

Basically, that report needed to be either the centerpiece of a sexual assault case, or else a criminal libel one.  At this late date, it’ll probably be neither.

Moe Lane

*There are also legitimate answers, too – mostly involving relative power levels, particularly between a powerful male Democratic politician and a female working-class massage therapist – but that’s another issue.

Crossposted to Moe Lane.

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