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Alan Grayson requests that Rick Santorum, ahem, ‘die quickly.’

That’s the most likely conclusion that one can draw, amazingly enough. Alan Grayson is typically precisely the sort of would-be domestic Taliban who might advocate the death of political… well, not ‘opponents.’ Rick Santorum is currently about three levels’ worth of influence above Grayson, and it’s Grayson’s fondest wish to shrink that disparity to two. So it’s very likely that the former Congressman from Florida is pretty much trying to ill-wish the Presidential candidate from Pennsylvania to death.

But there’s still the possibility that Grayson is merely abjectly stupid, so let’s pretend that he deserves the benefit of the doubt and analyze one of the latest whines of his in the most charitable of lights.

To back up for a moment: essentially, Grayson put out an email where he pretended to be all libertarian, and so forth. Yes, I know, absolutely absurd, but some liberals like to pretend that they’re actually libertarian, mostly because they think that it sounds cool. Anyway, in the middle of listing all the things that Santorum doesn’t have to do if he doesn’t want to do them, Alan Grayson – more accurately, the staffer who actually wrote this thing – demonstrated yet again that He* Just Doesn’t Get It with regards to libertarianism, elementary logic, or in fact sidereal reality. Because this was included in the list:

If you’re against universal health care, just keep your distance from doctors and hospitals.

Now, Alan – can I call you Alan? After all, it’s not like I have to call you ‘Congressman,’ or anything – I know that the strange world of the Triple-Digit IQ People is kind of confusing to you, but here’s something that you have to understand, anyway. You see, everything else that was on the list that your campaign staff put together and published under your name is, indeed, something that one could avoid, if one wanted to. But if people could opt out of Obamacare without penalty if they wanted to then it wouldn’t be universal health care. For that matter: you’re assuming that Rick Santorum has complete control over whether or not he has to seek medical treatment, which is of course not true. After all, accidents happen.

I mean, what is he supposed to do if one day, while Rick Santorum is minding his own business, some gibbering lunatic who dresses like a former KGB agent andcurrent pimp comes along and t-bones Rick’s bus? It hardly seems fair to expect Santorum to anticipate every loose cannon with entitlement issues that comes barreling down the highway…

Moe Lane (crosspost)

PS: Ace notes that there’s at least one normal person running against Grayson: Mark Oxner.

*The guy who wrote the campaign email was almost certainly male: Grayson has… issues… with women in positions of authority.

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