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FRONT PAGE CONTRIBUTOR

The Republican I’ll Root against This Fall

A GOP Senator Disgusting Enough to Make Even *ME* Bipartisan

That does it! Never mind that Hillary Rodham Clinton was the least Marxian of the major Democratic candidates in the primaries. Never mind that their nominee has quite literally voted in favor of retroactive abortions. I’ve now found a major GOP candidate for office that I would take great pleasure in being able to vote against.

Yes, I’ve told people that say the same about John McCain that a vote for anyone other than McCain is a vote for Obama. Yes, hypocrisy is the bow vice takes before virtue. But darn it, when Exalted Cyclops/Senator Robert Byrd stopped introducing himself to the good old boys at the Kleagle as Mr. AKAI, he became America’s 3rd most obnoxious Senator.

The man ahead of him not known for distance-swimming in Chappaquiddick Harbor hails from the Great State of Alaska. If a public official came any more corrupt or disingenuous than Alaska Senator Ted Stevens, Al Pacino could play them in a cheesy remake of The Devil’s Advocate. Either that or he’d be having cocktails with Bernadette Dorn at an Obama fundraiser.

Let me be direct, blunt and intentionally offensive. Ted Stevens is human filth. The GOP did a despicable thing by nominating this man for a 38th term in the US Senate. He is a Gilded Age Fossil. The type of Republican that helped elect another noted KKK Member/Democrat Woodrow Wilson.

There over 300 Republican incumbents and office-seekers who I genuinely wish Godspeed this November. Senator Stevens is one who does not fit in that category. Perhaps if Mayor Begich turns up on a sex-offender registry, I’ll change my mind. Otherwise, I can’t hate America enough to stay a GOP partisan on this one.

What was our party thinking on this one? Re-nominating Stevens is like feeding your own pancreatic cancer, in the hopes that it will kill off a few more good cells.

Obviously, a large number of Republicans need to grow up and accept the fact that we didn’t get handed our mutilated butt cheeks in 2006 solely because Foley was a perv and the media lied about Iraq. There was a culture of corruption in the GOP. Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid have both been corrupt long enough to know one when they see it.

The re-nomination of Boss Hogg, err, I mean Senator Stevens gives prima facie evidence that this culture of corruption still hasn’t gone completely into remission. Cry our beloved party, we proved too weak to expunge the powerful evil in residence within our own ranks.

As much as I deeply feel an acrid hatred for the Faculty-Lounge Bolsheviks and the P. T. Barnum Populists that write the ideological doctrine for the Democratic Party, I would feel unpatriotic if I actually rooted for Ted Stevens to remain in the Senate. If I lived in Alaska, I’d make like Emperor Caligula, and write in Incatatus. This cannot be what the GOP remains in future years.

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