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Fizzbin!

To explain, Fizzbin was a card game invented on the spur of the moment, by Captain James T. Kirk (Star Trek episode ‘A Piece Of The Action’). While held captive on a far-flung planet by a group of 1920s Chicago style gangsters (it’s a long story!), the good captain used it as a diversionary tactic while he planned his escape.

Being the gullible sort, the aliens took Kirk’s explanation of the rules as kosher, even the most ludicrous ones such as: ‘The second card is turned up, except on Tuesdays’ or ‘if a king had been dealt, the player would get another card, except when it is dark, in which case he’d have to give it back’.

As I sit here now, snowbound in our Offshore Command Center, I can see a parallel to the totally unbelievable explanations being given by the proponents of man-made global warming. A few years ago, they stated that snowfalls would become more rare. Now, it is a side-effect of the warming process. Much the same, I guess, as the 17 degree temperatures I experienced last week, a whopping 30 degrees lower than the norm for December.

These folks just won’t admit they were wrong. Those involved in the research don’t want to lose their sizable grants, and governments would have to pull another tax rabbit out of the hat to replace it. After being snowed in at the Copenhagen climate summit last year, they decided on somewhere a little warmer for 2010. Well, what a surprise, they descended on Cancun, Mexico, to enjoy the city’s lowest temperatures for 100 years.

Let’s take a look at the Fizzbin rule book. Ah, here we are, ‘global warming doesn’t apply when there’s an ‘r’ in the month, especially if there’s a lunar eclipse on the winter solstice’. Oh well, that explains it.

Naturally, the kind-hearted liberals are only thinking of the welfare of future generations. That’s the reason why seniors in Britain are dying of hypothermia in their homes, and those surviving are forced to use their free transport passes to ride the warm buses all day. Green taxes have pushed the cost of heating fuel out of reach of those on low incomes. I’m sure these poor souls are relieved to know that they are ‘saving the planet’.

The liberals’ manipulation of the truth and bending of the rules, including the Constitution, is a threat to freedom, the economy and life itself. They must be stopped… now! From January, we have the full House. That beats a Fizzbin… except perhaps in the White House on the eighth day of the week.

(Editor Dee is in for Skip today)

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