To anyone has been living out from underneath a large rock in the last 40 years, it’s not surprising that free speech is nothing more than a cute little needlepoint saying. It’s so adorable when a young buck espouses free speech. It’s almost like believing in Santa Clause or the Easter Bunny. Interestingly enough they’re both really creepy. Thanks to the moronification of the country by the PC movement, engaging in real free speech, you know, where you talk about the facts and what not, is as scary as telling a murderous clown that’s not funny.

Minnesota Representative Michele Bachmann is no stranger to the wrath of the PC police. In an interview with Chris Matthews on Hardball, Bachmann simply reflected the fears of her constituents and, many others around the country. You know, what a Representative is supposed to do, listen to the people. She simply said that Barack Obama “may have anti-American” views. Hold the phone! You can’t question a liberals’ hatred of this country! That goes against Saul Alinsky’s “Rules for Radicals.” You can’t let them know how radical he actually is. Joe Wurzelbacher was and is being vilified because he caused Obama to reveal his Socialism too soon. Even our buddy Nostrabiden said we’re not going to like them during their first two years in office. Maybe that’s because in the real world socialism becomes violent communism. Or maybe it’s just because we get tired of looking at plugs.

It’s good to know that you can’t talk about your feelings. Michele Bachmann can’t say that she feels Barack Obama may have anti-American views. She can’t even feel that way when all the neon signs point to Obama being a socialist which is, in itself, socialist. You have to hate this country and everything it stands for to want to dismantle capitalism. Capitalism, a.k.a. the force that allowed Barack Obama to write his memoirs in his 40’s and make a fortune. That kind of capitalism.

The MSM is making such a big deal out of a simple comment a conservative made yet no one seems to care that Obama is schooled and taught others in the Alinsky method or that he’s chummy with a domestic terrorist. They also don’t care that Obama’s brand of religion is a truly disgusting and hateful kind that is blasphemy to call it anything remotely close to Christianity. Not only are they making a big deal out of it, the pressure has caused Bachmann to essentially retract her statement, at least the portion they chose.

The AP decides to put quotes around Bachmann’s statement that it was a “big mistake” to go on Hardball making it seem like she’s saying her comments were a big mistake. The real big mistake here is thinking that this country really believes in free speech. Free speech only if you agree with the PC Gulag. Go ahead and make fun of Caucasian Southerners, stomp all over their flag, call them racist like fatty Murtha but don’t say anything about Obama being anti-American. Don’t mention that it’s odd to keep Hussein as your middle name, don’t mention that his Kenyan father took a spot in American schools, knocked up his mother then abandoned the family. Those are totally off limits. Socialism is off limits because everyone knows that that’s not what Obama espouses because if he really did he wouldn’t be sitting on his money. If he thought it was important to spread the wealth around he’d be giving a lot more in charity now wouldn’t he. He really shouldn’t be Robin Hood for Halloween. No, I think Obama should be Pinocchio as a robber. He wants to steal your money then lie to your face about it. That sounds like a really bad Lifetime movie.

Bachmann is now saying this, “I did not say that Barack Obama was anti-American, nor do I believe Barack Obama is anti-American. He loves his country, just as everyone in this room does.” I disagree, I think we should question not only patriotism but the motives of a guy that would write his memoirs in his 40’s. He’s one of thousands of people that have dabbled in cocaine; probably a lot of them from the ivies and the like. It’s called rebellion of the privileged. It’s also called poor judgment.

Are we supposed to start calling Joe Biden Nostradamus or just captain obvious? Biden’s assertion that Obama will be tested by an “international crisis” is about as obvious as his claims only months ago that Obama was not qualified to be president. It’s a shame that he doesn’t stick to his guns, let alone bibles.

CNS News has this quote from Nostrabiden, “Mark my words… It will be not six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking. We’re about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator president of the United States of America. Remember, I said it standing here, if you don’t remember anything else I said: Watch, we’re gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy.”

I wonder if, like he did during the primaries, Biden thought to himself you know what, this guy shouldn’t be president of the United States. I wonder if while he was busy forgetting that the press was at this fundraiser that because of Obama’s weak stance on the protection of Israel Iran might think it a good idea to go for the gusto. Well, lucky for Nostrabiden, I’ve thought of some things for him.

I tried to put myself in the mind of a terrorist. After I displaced the thoughts of the 40 hairy virgins I thought that having Obama as president of the free world would be a great idea. I mean think about it, this is a guy that wants to sit down and talk to me when all I really want to do is wipe Israel off the face of the earth and exterminate all the infidels. That’s pretty sweet. Hey, once he gets in office we might as well get to it.

Now that I’m back in the mind of a brilliant and fabulously good looking American I think to myself that it’s not such a good idea to invite a terror magnet into the presidency. Tim Kaine came out with the gaffe mop arguing that the world is going to test us. Isn’t it interesting though, with George W. Bush in office for approximately 7 years we’ve been safe. Now according to Nostrabiden and Kaine as soon as Obama gets in office we’re going to have some problems. That’s fascinating. Now looking at Biden’s words, as painful as that might be, wouldn’t one think that gee, kind of like Kennedy the Man Ho, Barack Obama is a lot of hype and saturated fat with no substance.

McCain, rightly so, jumped on the comment and argued that Obama won’t have the right response in the case of a threat. Wait a second. Does he mean that sitting down with terrorists for tea and crumpets isn’t a good idea? Of course it’s a bad idea. Sure, let’s sit down and chat with a guy with a Napoleonic complex whose eyes are way too close together. You’d be cranky too.

For example, let’s take a look at Obama’s website that talks about how he and Biden want to create peace in the middle-east. Isn’t that cute and a little anti-christ-like? What about Obama’s continued refusal to acknowledge that the surge worked? Nope, he and his other Socialist buddies think that we should be in Afghanistan, which we are, or that we should be in Palestine creating peace and love between the Jews and the Muslims. I don’t know about you but that sounds a little it’s the end of the world and I don’t feel fine to me. By the way, don’t you think that if your middle name was Hitler or Stalin you’d mosey on down and have that changed? Why in the world would you run for president of the U.S. with the middle name Hussein?

It’s nice that Nostrabiden is coming out and saying what the rest of the sane population has said: Barack Obama shouldn’t be president.

Are we supposed to start calling Joe Biden Nostradamus or just captain obvious? Biden’s assertion that Obama will be tested by an “international crisis” is about as obvious as his claims only months ago that Obama was not qualified to be president. It’s a shame that he doesn’t stick to his guns, let alone bibles.

CNS News has this quote from Nostrabiden, “Mark my words… It will be not six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking. We’re about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator president of the United States of America. Remember, I said it standing here, if you don’t remember anything else I said: Watch, we’re gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy.”

I wonder if, like he did during the primaries, Biden thought to himself you know what, this guy shouldn’t be president of the United States. I wonder if while he was busy forgetting that the press was at this fundraiser that because of Obama’s weak stance on the protection of Israel Iran might think it a good idea to go for the gusto. Well, lucky for Nostrabiden, I’ve thought of some things for him.

I tried to put myself in the mind of a terrorist. After I displaced the thoughts of the 40 hairy virgins I thought that having Obama as president of the free world would be a great idea. I mean think about it, this is a guy that wants to sit down and talk to me when all I really want to do is wipe Israel off the face of the earth and exterminate all the infidels. That’s pretty sweet. Hey, once he gets in office we might as well get to it.

Now that I’m back in the mind of a brilliant and fabulously good looking American I think to myself that it’s not such a good idea to invite a terror magnet into the presidency. Tim Kaine came out with the gaffe mop arguing that the world is going to test us. Isn’t it interesting though, with George W. Bush in office for approximately 7 years we’ve been safe. Now according to Nostrabiden and Kaine as soon as Obama gets in office we’re going to have some problems. That’s fascinating. Now looking at Biden’s words, as painful as that might be, wouldn’t one think that gee, kind of like Kennedy the Man Ho, Barack Obama is a lot of hype and saturated fat with no substance.

McCain, rightly so, jumped on the comment and argued that Obama won’t have the right response in the case of a threat. Wait a second. Does he mean that sitting down with terrorists for tea and crumpets isn’t a good idea? Of course it’s a bad idea. Sure, let’s sit down and chat with a guy with a Napoleonic complex whose eyes are way too close together. You’d be cranky too.

For example, let’s take a look at Obama’s website that talks about how he and Biden want to create peace in the middle-east. Isn’t that cute and a little anti-christ-like? What about Obama’s continued refusal to acknowledge that the surge worked? Nope, he and his other Socialist buddies think that we should be in Afghanistan, which we are, or that we should be in Palestine creating peace and love between the Jews and the Muslims. I don’t know about you but that sounds a little it’s the end of the world and I don’t feel fine to me. By the way, don’t you think that if your middle name was Hitler or Stalin you’d mosey on down and have that changed? Why in the world would you run for president of the U.S. with the middle name Hussein?

It’s nice that Nostrabiden is coming out and saying what the rest of the sane population has said: Barack Obama shouldn’t be president.

Colin Powell finally comes out and endorses Barack Obama on, as Mark Levin calls it, “Meet the Depressed.” His reasoning for endorsing Barack Obama seems like it’s in another language. Now you may be asking yourself what he’s saying. For example he asserts that Obama would be an “exceptional president.” Is this French? Swahili? Mandarin? Nay my friends, this language is called delusional racism and I should note that I am fluent. I’ll translate for you.

Powell said that Barack Obama would be a “transformational figure.” This roughly translated means that he is half black, and that “ain’t whack.” Powell said that either Obama or McCain would be “a good president.” This means that while John McCain would be a better president he’s just too white to be right. In regards to Sarah Palin, Powell quipped, “But…I don’t believe she is ready to be president of the United States.” This line is tough to translate as it can mean two things. First meaning; Sarah Palin’s accent is kind of Canadian, and we all know Canadians can be shifty. Second and more literal meaning; since Barack Obama is half black, I think I’ll swallow my pride and argue that Joe “jobs is a three letter word” Biden would be a great president.

Now that we’ve got the wording deciphered it’s clear where the racism lies. It’s not in Western Pennsylvania, it’s actually festering in Colin Powell. How else do you describe shirking your party and formally endorsing a communist? Could it be bad beef? I haven’t heard any recent cases of Mad Cow disease. I know I don’t follow beef contamination religiously or anything so I suppose that could be true.

Let’s say it isn’t racism. How about for a moment we jump into the magic happy land that doesn’t look at facts or concrete evidence. I call this magical land of ignorance MSNBC. I shall put on the MSNBC goggles and see what it looks like. Wow, Barack Obama does look a lot like Robin Hood. Look at him spread the mystical wealth all over the people. Everyone’s so happy. The Weather Underground is dropping bombs of joy, slum lords are living together with their tenants painting rainbows on the walls, oh and look, The View is actually relevant! I don’t recommend trying that at home kids. If you do try it, take off the MSNBC goggles slowly so as not to be blinded by the light of reality. Oh and the horse crap smell goes away after a few minutes.

Wait, that can’t be right. Back in the land of reality, all arrows point to Colin Powell being an unabashed racist. Why just last summer Powell donated to the McCain campaign and well I guess got a years worth of clarity. Maybe the McCain campaign is just too darn negative for him. What with McCain refusing to attack Barack Obama and rebuking his supporters for being too negative. God forbid anyone point out Obama’s socialist ideals. Look what happened to Joe the Plumber. All he did was ask a question and because Obama forgot rule number one in the radicalist playbook, “don’t tell them you’re a big ol’ radical,” he gets raked through the mud. Powell then played the insidious “I’ll vote for whoever is best for the country no matter what party bladdy bladdy blah,” card. Which we know really means that now, regardless of the facts, regardless of his platform, Powell can vote for Obama without having to say explicitly that it’s because he’s black. There’s only two reasons why Obama would be a “transformative figure,” and those are because he’s half black or because he’ll help turn this country into a third world communistic cesspool.

No matter how you look at it, either Colin Powell is a racist or he’s drinking the kool-aid.

If you’re like me, you’re not only breathtakingly gorgeous and hilarious, you also are tired of the lack of conservatism in satire. Extreme Punditry wants to fill that void and aid in the conservative movement. We also want to make fun of liberals especially those with big butts. If any of this sounds good to you, check out the blog, www.myspace.com/extremepunditry. Read the blog, leave comments, send me a message and tell your friends.

EP