One of the things Donald Trump is always touting is his ability to find quality people and put them in the right spots. It's basically the entire answer he has to the objection that he lacks any sort of experience at all. Meanwhile his campaign is staffed largely by flaming trainwrecks, and none is more flammable than his national spokesperson Katrina Pierson.

Pierson's history of saying insane things was fisked pretty thoroughly over the weekend, but saying crazy things with a straight face is probably a feature, not a bug, when it comes to working for Trump. It turns out, however, that Pierson is also barely literate and incapable of writing things that make sense.

We dug through our email archives here at RedState and found an email that Pierson sent us in 2012. If this is the sort of person you want writing communications on behalf of the President of the United States, then by all means, vote Trump. A little background is necessary here - what Pierson is specifically complaining about in this email is that we had run an op-ed on the front page of RedState by Rick Perry. We frequently run op-eds from candidates here at RedState, and they do not imply endorsement whatsoever. Without further ado, here is the email in all its glory. I've annotated it here for your amusement, but also included a full version at the bottom in case you want to see it all together in one place.

From: Katrina Pierson[email redacted]
Subject: RedState - Presidential Articles?
Date: January 6, 2012 12:51:38 AM EST
To: Erick Erickson [email redacted]

 

Hi Erik,
I already have to stop. Apparently, Erick's first name is a tricky thing for many people to spell. I get that it's probably more common for people to spell it Eric or Erik or whatever. The thing is, Erick's email address, which she typed in, includes his name as it is properly spelled - i.e., Erick. So, she went ahead and typed in "erick@" to get the email address right, then, I guess... figured that the actual spelling of his first name was Erik?
I noticed an article today in RedState, and I was left a little confused as it was written by my Governor, Rick Perry as linked below.
http://www.redstate.com/governorperry/2012/01/05/stop-insider-trading-dead-in-its-tracks/
It's very confusing. An article? Written by her own governor? How is this even possible? I guess if it had been written by the governor of any of the other 49 states it would have made sense, but... her own governor? So confuse! I'm gonna pass over the grammatical offal for now, because it's about to get so much worse.
Is insider trading the same as making land deals?
Uh, no it is not. And if I did not know the answer to this question, I would type it into Google instead of including it in an email and sending it out where an actual person might read it and realize that I don't know the difference between insider trading and "making land deals."
Perry has been creating his wealth the same way many of the co-career politicians that he is criticising in the link below.
Again, not really even conceptually the same thing, but moving along.
Now, I had not realized that Red State had endorsed in the presidential race, co could you confrim this endorsment for me? There are several Conservaitvies who have looked to RedState and the projection of honesty, as well as for integrity in the midst of main stream media bias.
I included this paragraph exactly as it was written. I really thought that part of the job of working in communications was that you had to know how to spell basic English words, but what do I know? I will say that Pierson gets points for originality because that is the first time I have seen "conservatives" spelled "Conservaitvies" - although she gets a bonus for randomly capitalizing the word, just to show how important it is to her. More importantly, though, what the hell does this mean: "There are several Conservaitvies (sic) who have looked to RedState and the projection of honesty"? And if you tack on "as well as for integrity in the midst of main stream media bias[,]" it gets even worse.
If RedState had not endorsed Rick Perry, I would like to know who I could have an article submitted by Speaker Newt Gingrich.
Again I emphasize, I'm just cutting and pasting here. At least I can tell what Pierson wants here - she wants RedState to run an op-ed from Newt. Just because she doesn't know when to use the subjunctive (and when to not), and just because the second sentence doesn't actually make sense as written, doesn't mean that I can't at least suss that part out. I'm a trained professional at deciphering horrible writing. But it's about to get so much worse still.
The Speaker, if far more Conservative on fiscal issues, he has actually balanced a budget with out a constitutional mandate in place, reformed welfare under a Democrat Presidnet and can effectively debate Mitt Romeny for first place.
I just can't. This is even worse than reading Meghan McCain. All I'll say is that it's too bad we never got to see whether "Presidnet" "Romeny" would have been a good "Presidnet" or not.
He is also well versed on our current foreign policy as it has continues to creep to the top of the list of concerns facing our country.
"[A]s it has continues."
So, if you could point me in the direction to securing an article for RedState for Speaker Gingrich, I would greatly appreaciate it.
I would "appreaciate" it if high school teachers would not graduate students until they at least passed 7th grade spelling.
Thanks for all that you do, Erick
Wait, so he's "Erick" again?
Best Regards,
Katrina Pierson
Dallas Tea Party
Top. Men.
Here's the whole letter, in all its glory.
Hi Erik,
I noticed an article today in RedState, and I was left a little confused as it was written by my Governor, Rick Perry as linked below.
http://www.redstate.com/governorperry/2012/01/05/stop-insider-trading-dead-in-its-tracks/
Is insider trading the same as making land deals? Perry has been creating his wealth the same way many of the co-career politicians that he is criticising in the link below.
Now, I had not realized that Red State had endorsed in the presidential race, co could you confrim this endorsment for me? There are several Conservaitvies who have looked to RedState and the projection of honesty, as well as for integrity in the midst of main stream media bias.
If RedState had not endorsed Rick Perry, I would like to know who I could have an article submitted by Speaker Newt Gingrich. The Speaker, if far more Conservative on fiscal issues, he has actually balanced a budget with out a constitutional mandate in place, reformed welfare under a Democrat Presidnet and can effectively debate Mitt Romeny for first place. He is also well versed on our current foreign policy as it has continues to creep to the top of the list of concerns facing our country.
So, if you could point me in the direction to securing an article for RedState for Speaker Gingrich, I would greatly appreaciate it.
Thanks for all that you do, Erick
Best Regards,
Katrina Pierson
Dallas Tea Party