God, Liberals are odd

They’re not like you and me

They brush their teeth with vinegar

And rinse them with green tea.

They see a glass that’s brimming

In haste declare it dry

Insisting us conservatives

Find more that meets the eye.

Their middle name is Criticize

They parse and grouse and yet

They speak a special language

That only Liberals get.

They thrive on metaphorical

And worship high IQ’s

The Libs could not be farther from

The world of me’s and you’s.

God, Liberals are odd

Pray tell what makes them tick

They think of us as liars

Past puddings prove they’re sick.

Quite like the odd professors

Aloft in towering zeal

Resembling hurts in Hollywood

Who’ve lost all sense of real.

And now there’s Sarah Palin

That right rambunctious Red

Most Liberals and their Media

How scornfully they shred.

You’d think they’d never been to church

Or hardly ever pray

For if they do, please tell us true

What do the snipers say?

She has no real experience

No organizer she

She never went to Harvard

Oh woe to you and me.

Most surely she’s imperfect

So TR in a dress

God, help the Libs find common ground

As they distend the mess. 

God, Liberals are odd

They make your country sick

They speak your truth in different tongues

And work to make it stick.

They thrive on