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Why I support King Newt!

By: Remington_Steele (Diary)  |  April 16th, 2012 at 10:06 PM  | 

RESIZE: AAA

I know many at Redstate have been wondering why I support King Newt.  Well wait no longer, I will tell you why:

  • Master Historian, Speaker Extraordinaire, The Last Great Conservative Hope will banish the weeping and wailing of timid supporters called Republicans.
  • He crafts supernal words that cut through the media’s disrespect and insolence.
  • He whispers simple truths that make RINOs cower in fear.
  • He has beaten his baggage into shiny kevlar armor and mounts his charismatic steed with the grace of a prince.
  • He welds the finest bow and each arrow is made from the purest hand crafted Big Idea.
  • His swordplay is impeccable and he has beaten Inigo Montoya and humiliated the Dread Pirate Roberts.
  • His war chest is lined with the finest platinum cards

Mark my words.  It will be a cold day in Tampa when the gathering will happen and turmoil will abound from the lack of hard delegates for the ultimate conservative traitor.

Out of the mist shall a hero arise and then walk to the center of that great hall.  He shall grasp the immovable sword stuck in the stone.  Pulling it free he shall claim his rightful heir and our great champion.  The downtrodden masses shall erupt in deafening cheers as the conservative traitor is forgotten and our great new King shall be crowned victor!  Only then can the wicked oppressor be defeated.

Stay hopeful my friends, August is still yet to come!

Sincerely,

The oldest Redstate Rombot

COMMENTS

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  • gekster

    would post like this, it would sway more people to Gingrich than the constant Romney bashing ever could.
    But in my opinion, promoting Newt doesn’t appear to be thier aim.
    and that in itself is bad.

    • garfieldjl

      I’m not sure if it was written in a sarcastic tone, considering the individual that wrote it.

      However, still it was a pretty good poem.

      I actually do want Newt to tie the walking teleprompter into knots.

      • gekster

        I said what I ment and I ment what I said.

  • powertothepeople

    and had you not put in the obvious ending showing sarcasm, I would have sworn some of the people here like Garfield had hacked your account.

    I begrudgingly support Romney now, and will continue to do so until Obama is dethroned.

    Nice Post!

  • Remington_Steele

    We all need to start pulling together and I know that will take time. I hope Newt will admit that after the obvious happens in Delaware.

  • Remington_Steele

    I’m glad P2theP caught the meaning to my ending. I don’t post often, and for a long while it was hard to post here as a pro Romney voice. For those that don’t know me, I am one of the oldest Rombots at RS. :)

  • APA Guy

    I actually think Newt would make an AWESOME VP choice. He is experienced…sharp…intelligent…everything we want from someone who is a heartbeat from the presidency. I just don’t know if the scars from this primary battle will afford Romney asking Newt and/or Newt accepting.

    But I’d sure like to see him on the trail…almost as much as I’d like to see him dismantle Biden on the debate dais.