Sometimes, Everyone Who's Naked Is Hot: A West Virginia Naturist Resort Burns Down During Its 'Nude Year's Eve' Celebration

 

 

Some things don’t mix — like bananas and jelly, peanut butter and ketchup, and fire and nudity.

Yet, on New Year’s Eve, two great flavors came together.

The Cumberland Times-News reports that firefighters from three different states were called to a retreat in Paw Paw, West Virginia.

Avalon Resort was having a big fat bash when the party went up in smoke.

And everyone was especially at risk because they weren’t wearing clothes.

The primeval paradise was holding its “Nude Year’s Eve” celebration when an unwelcome glowing guest joined in the jiggling jollies and dangling delights: Photos online showed a whole buncha stuff burnin’ down in the woods.

As per Avalon’s website, the butt-naked nod to nature is the world’s “friendliest clothing-optional resort.”

And that’s saying something, as I can think of nothing “friendlier” than getting wholly naked.

Sadly, flames flabbergasted the friendly.

According to Avalon’s official Facebook page, a few different areas were damaged, including that free-for-all where your betting-in-the-buff dreams can all come true:

On New Years Eve we had a fire in the lodge. Thankfully, no one was injured. The aquatic center was not affected at all, the nudsino needs some work and clean up but can be back up and running. The barn was untouched. We are temporarily closed but are already working on plans to reopen. We also want to thank all of the fire companies and EMS crews that came to our aid. We will keep everyone updated.

Nudsino!

Hopefully, they don’t play poker.

They should put one of those in San Francisco — patrons could play craps.

Back to the fire, I’m happy to relay that no one was hurt.

Thank goodness.

And — though it turned out their New Year’s wasn’t all it was cracked up to be — I hope everyone got to watch the ball drop.

-ALEX

 

Find all my RedState work here.

And please follow Alex Parker on Twitter and Facebook.

Thank you for reading! Please sound off in the Comments section below.