The culture wars continue and the social justice warriors of the Left march relentlessly onward. Here are seven of the goofiest and screwiest stories gleaned from the bowels of the Internet.
Creepy Democratic Presidential Wannabe
There are some certified weirdos running for the Democratic nomination for President in 2020. Apparently trying to outdo the bovine pornographic poetry of Beto O’Rourke and the fact he ate sacred dirt in New Mexico, John Hicklenhooper- the former governor of Colorado- and man with the longest name in the mix in 2020 admitted that he once took his mother to see Deep Throat. And it wasn’t an accident on his part. He knew the movie was “naughty,” but took his mother nevertheless because he thought she needed a night out. This is how weird the Democrats have become- they eat dirt and take their moms to the nearest porn flick for a night out.
Speaking of Creepy…
Barbra Streisand who, rumor has it, may have anteater in her genetic past, recently escaped from her cryogenic chamber to comment on a recent documentary on Michael Jackson’s sexual…um, proclivities. Said the singer with the proboscis:
His sexual needs were his sexual needs, coming from whatever childhood he has or whatever DNA he has. You can say ‘molested,’ but those children, as you heard say, they were thrilled to be there. They both married and they both have children, so it didn’t kill them…
Yikes!! One wonders if Streisand ever took her father to a porno flick for a night out.
Georgia Testicles Under Attack
A Georgia legislator- Dar’shun Kendrick- introduced a bill that would, among other things, require men to ask permission from their partners before taking Viagra or erectile dysfunction medication and wait 24 hours before purchasing a sex toy. The lawmaker wants to classify sex without a condom as “aggravated assault” and ban vasectomy procedures. Men would also be forced to begin paying child support before a woman reaches eight weeks in pregnancy. An obvious publicity stunt against a proposed abortion bill, Ms. (I assume) Kendrick had her 15 minutes of Georgia fame.
New York Gays Turn on One of Their Own
Brandon Straka is a gay New Yorker who started the #WalkAway campaign. He was scheduled to hold a town hall at the city’s LGBT Center. under intense pressure from liberal Democrats losing voters, the Center cancelled the event. Their statement canceling the event says it all:
The Center has cancelled the March 28 Walk Away event. We strongly oppose censorship and fully stand by our commitment to free speech, but as our space use policy states, we reserve the right to cancel any event that promotes discriminatory speech or bigotry; negatively impacts other groups or individuals that use The Center; or conflicts with, or interferes with, Center-sponsored or produced programming. It has become clear that this event would violate all of these important policies.
Get that? Leaving the Democratic Party promotes discriminatory speech or bigotry, negatively impacts people and conflicts with the work of the LGBT Center.
Racial Healing at San Diego State
I’m not saying anything that can’t be said in the flyer for this event:
This intimate one and a half hour Racial Healing Workshop catered to students and faculty of color will be led by well-known professional, Dr. Cheryl E. Matias. She will provide a safe space for students and faculty of color to discuss issues that impact persons of color in higher academia. Dr. Matias will facilitate group healing and she will provide tools to help POC navigate racialized spaces such as higher education and professional fields.
Black students at the Princeton Theological Seminary are demanding that the prestigious Ivy League college pony up $5 million a year to make amends for the sins of the past. The seminary, founded over 154 years ago, apparently had some founders who were slaveholders. Unsure of whether the seminary uses the same admission criteria as Princeton itself where black are spotted 230 points on the SAT and Asians penalized 80 points, one thing is certain: about 155 years from now Asians will demanding reparations from elite universities.
More Loony Academia Drivel
The City University of New York’s graduate English department recently hosted as event called “Refusing Institutional Whiteness: Possibilities, Alternatives, and Beyond.” Whiteness is obviously a problem for college English departments since English is a European language. Hence, a lot of writers who have written in English are white. Authors from Chaucer to Shakespeare to Hemingway are all race criminals. Imagine this happening in a foreign country like China. Can one imagine a seminar dedicated to eliminating the problem of “Chineseness?” It would never be tolerated which is why the Chinese will know more about Shakespeare than an American graduate of an English course of study in the future.