Health foods and superfoods have been known to take weird twists and turns as their fads come and go. There are some things that seem perfectly reasonable – like quinoa and kale – and some things that are just downright absurd – like spirulina, which is algae turned into a powder for our consumption for some reason.
However, CBS News stumbled across the latest up-and-coming fad that proves we are truly born outside of God’s grace and must beg for forgiveness and redemption in order to be made pure in His eyes again.
Is cockroach milk the next superfood trend?
— CBS News (@CBSNews) May 26, 2018
Before even clicking the link, there are plenty of natural questions that come to mind. Who would even think this up? Why would someone do this to their fellow man? Do cockroaches even have nipples? I could go on and on, but you get the point.
Now, if you were unaware that cockroach milk was even a thing, it’s probably because you were a little distracted when it first debuted. After all, 2016 was a busy year already filled with strange, strange events.
Apparently, it rightfully waned after it debuted… only to come back in 2018, which is proving to already be an even more insane year. Here’s what CBS writes about the trend.
The pesky bug is actually filled with an energy-rich milk-like substance.
Did anyone else gag reading that?
It’s not your typical non-dairy milk alternative like almond milk, but cockroach milk is gaining popularity once again, after coming to the forefront in 2016.
In 2016, a research team based at the Institute for Stem Cell Biology and Regenerative Medicine in India said the “milk” from the Pacific beetle cockroach could make for the next great superfood. These cockroaches possess protein-rich crystals that lactate to feed their young.
This particular type of cockroach, which is usually found on Pacific islands like Hawaii, gives birth to their babies, as opposed to laying eggs. Their “milk” is made up of protein-infused crystals reported to have three times the energy of the equivalent mass of normal dairy milk.
“The crystals are like a complete food — they have proteins, fats and sugars. If you look into the protein sequences, they have all the essential amino acids,” Sanchari Banerjee, one of the main researchers, told the Times of India.
This is fascinating, really, but there is a problem here: You’re talking about cockroaches.
I get that nutrients are awesome and all, and that there are cultures where bugs are a delicacy. I am fine with all that. I won’t eat them, but I do understand the importance of culture. However, this isn’t a cultural thing. This is a group of people who are looking for nutrient-rich substances in creatures that we have no business trying to milk – which is actually, apparently, a tough thing to do.
Some scientists and cockroach milk producers admit that it may be hard to get people on the bandwagon, but that’s not the only road block for cockroach milk. Besides for its unappealing name, cockroach milk is hard to come by. Roaches aren’t the easiest creatures to milk, NPR reports.
Look, we just went through this whole thing about whether or not torture is good or justifiable or whatever when we went through the Gina Haspel confirmation. I don’t like the idea of torture, but I do think it is justifiable to torture the people who came up with this idea and put a stop to them before they decide that a certain species of jungle cat’s dung, when powdered, is so filled with the proper vitamins that it should be the next rich chocolate Ovaltine.