I had trouble selecting the most overdone and obnoxious Grunge track to post in honor of our nation’s malarial outbreak of Slime-Ball Clinton 90’s Nostalgia. Somewhere Vince Foster’s suffering poltergeist is wailing. “No! Not Soundgarden again!”

The suppurating pustule of sleaze and dishonest ambition that is the Clinton Family erupted forth with the putrescent pestilent pasty puss of dishonesty. We all know that Hillary Rodham Clinton conducted her professional business as Secretary of State in a way that would lead to job loss, maybe jail time and professional setback if it were any mere mortal. She kept her government business on a private server and conducted it through a non-USG email address at a time when her private foundation was raking in monetary contributions from foreign countries with which the US State Department just happened to be actively engaged. How coincidental!

Her behavior when caught in the flagrantly obvious skullduggery that makes up the majority of her resume bullets was so….Clinton! She held a press conference in a very condescendingly Clintonian fashion. She answered carefully pre-vetted questions in as uninformative and perfunctory a manner as possible. She began with the obviously self-serving and inadequate attempt at exculpatory reasoning. She meant to be a lawful, upstanding citizen; except that it’s a pain in the old rectal cavity.

“I opted for convenience to use my personal email account, which was allowed by the State Department, because I thought it would be easier to carry just one device for my work and for my personal emails instead of two. Looking back, it would have been better if I simply used a second email account,” she said. “But at the time, this didn’t seem like an issue.”

However, she is providing tens of thousands of emails. That’s everything she sent out of the server save the tens of thousands of other emails she deleted. And the server will remain private.

After Clinton’s remarks, her team sent a document out to reporters revealing that during the span of her time in Obama’s service, March 2009 to February 2013, Clinton sent and received 62,320 emails. Of those, 30,490 were provided to the State Department, the nine-page ‘statement from the Office of Former Secretary Clinton’ said, and the remaining 31,830 were private, personal records.’

This is followed up by the Clinton Lie. That’s the Big Lie Goebbels talked about, except that it uses anabolic steroids. The way Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire did – back in the 90’s! And just because it’s a Clinton doing this instead of anyone possessing the requisite senses of opprobrium and shame to qualify as a human being, we get treated to the following bilge. Hillary wants you to know that you’re welcome, America.

“For any government employee, it is that government employee’s responsibility to determine what’s personal and what’s work related,” Mrs. Clinton told reporters. “I went above and beyond what I was requested to do. Once the American public begins to see the emails, they will have an unprecedented insight into a high government official’s daily communications,” she said.

There is one cool thing about that vile decomposing hag that Bill Clinton married forcing 90’s grunge back into my head with the bilious taste of backwash. Kurt Cobain was nice enough to explain where Clintons go* when they do us all a favor and suffer from enough fatal entropy to support the Carbon Cycle.

*-Like the Clintons, Cobain wasn’t being original. The Meat Puppets first graced the airwaves with “Lake of Fire” back in the Mid-1980s. I picked the sucky, 1990’s version because, you know; Clinton!