The Often Tardy but Never in Doubt RedState Sports Report Returns

Greetings from the sports desk located somewhere below decks of the Good Pirate Ship RedState. Your intrepid reporter trio — yours truly, along with Sammy the Shark and Karl the Kraken — have at least for the moment swept enough fish crackers off the desk (Sammy and Karl have got to learn how to clean up after themselves) to unearth the computer and, in the immortal words of that wise sage philosopher Larry the Cable Guy, git’r done. For those keeping tabs on RedState’s favorite sea monsters, Sammy still refuses to trade his Erik Karlsson action figure to Sammy or Perry the Penguin whenever he stops by.

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In news of note, whether anyone cares or not, the 2023 Women’s World Cup is currently taking place in Australia and New Zealand. The heavily favored U.S. squad has thus far shown itself as averse to putting the ball in the opponent’s net as they are to showing proper respect to The Star Spangled Banner. Nevertheless, despite their sleepwalk through the opening round, the squad has managed to make it into the knockout round. The first (and last, if they don’t get it together) game will be against Sweden on August 6 at 5 a.m. Eastern. Set your alarms, or not.

NFL training camps are now in full session. We’ve already seen Cincinnati Bengals stud QB Joe Burrow go down with a calf injury that will keep him out of action for “several weeks.” Ouch. At least his injury occurred on the field; Buffalo Bills running back/kick returner Nyheim Hines will miss the entire season after a jet ski accident. At least it wasn’t his fault. He was stopped on his when someone else decided to stop their jet ski by running into him.

The WNBA season … exists.

In MLB news, aside from commissioner Rob Manfred doing his utmost to strong-arm everyone into moving the A’s from Oakland to Las Vegas whether Sin City wants them or not — for the record, they don’t — the major news consists of who was, and who wasn’t, traded at the now-concluded trading deadline. After spending ten bajillion dollars during the off-season on every big-name player available, the New York Mets, who at the moment are 18 games out of first place in their division, have decided maybe this wasn’t the best way to do things and have traded away some of the recently acquired big names. Most noticeable is Justin Verlander returning to the Houston Astros, this move coming at the delight of the team bringing its aging but still producing star pitcher back and the Astros’ ticket office bolstering staff for the anticipated sales surge whenever Verlander pitches under the assumption his wife Kate Upton will be in attendance. The player everyone thought would be traded but wasn’t was Los Angeles (Even Though They Play in Anaheim) Angels’ once-in-a-century talent Shohei Ohtani – this despite the fact he is a free agent at season’s end. Apparently, the Angels believe they can re-sign him. Good luck with that.

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Finally, an observation. Posts like this inevitably draw several “I won’t watch sports anymore because they’ve gone woke” comments. I get that. I respect that. I obviously disagree with that, as I still watch the games if for no other reason than love for the games themselves, the skills and strategies employed.

I also work in a sporting goods store. I frequently see the utter delight of a kid getting a new bat and glove. I see the ten-year-old girl’s eyes light up like a fully illuminated Christmas tree when she finally sweet-talks Mom into that Alex Morgan jersey. While sports are not a significant priority in the grand scheme of things, they can and should serve as a diversion from the daily, be it personal or political. I believe sports are worth fighting for. That is why I write these all-too-occasional scribbles, hoping to bring a few chuckles and facilitate the opportunity for conservative sports fans to come together in a place where their beliefs will not be insulted and they will not receive ridicule. We need that space and the refreshment provided by diversion.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to tell Sammy the Shark and Karl the Kraken to get the fish cracker crumbs off the sofa.

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