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Gail Collins: all hat and no cattle.

In the latest Muppets movie, the plot (such as it is) revolves about a villain seeking to destroy the Muppets’ theater. There’s oil beneath the structure, and the evil Tex Richman will stop at nothing to get it. Just in case the subtlety escapes you: he’s the bad guy because he’s rich, he’s mean, and he’s Texan.

If you’ve seen this contribution to the cinematic art, then you’ve mostly got the point of NYT columnist Gail Collins’s latest book — and in light of her recent sojourn in Austin, it’s worth a few words on it. “As Texas Goes: How the Lone Star State Hijacked the American Agenda” could have been many things: a trenchant leftward critique of the state; an exploration of Texas’s importance in American life and politics; or a stranger-in-a-strange-land travelogue. It is somewhat all of these, and fully none of them. Collins is obviously intrigued by Texas. The question is whether she understands it. “As Texas Goes” leaves one to wonder.

The Lone Star State’s identity is bound tightly with its history, to an extent unfound in most other states, and so it’s important to assess whether an author writing on Texas has a proper grasp of the topic. Fortunately, Collins gives the reader a sense of this immediately, in the second paragraph of her prologue:

“Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may,” [Texas Governor Rick Perry] said, quoting the state’s great founding father, Sam Houston. When Houston made that remark, he was definitely attempting to break away from the country to which Texas was then attached.

Collins apparently believes that Houston’s quote was a rousing call to arms during the 1836 Texas Revolution against Mexico. It was, alas, uttered by United States Senator Sam Houston on June 29th, 1850, during debate in that august body. No secession from any nation was intended. This is easily confirmed with some basic research — the relevant U.S. Senate records are available online — yet it went undone in the course of Collins’s work.

The rest of the book continues in this vein. “[T]o be brutally honest,” writes Collins, “there isn’t all that much to see at the Alamo.” Later: “Davy Crockett should have whacked [Alamo commander Colonel Travis] over the head and gotten the men out of the fort.” If you think Thomas Friedman’s conversations with taxi drivers around the world are insightful, then you’ll value this sort of exposition.

It is possible to critique at length the historical treatment in Collins’s work, but what matters is her assessment of Texas now. This is no small matter: Texas has been the nation’s major job-creation engine for the past half-decade, responsible for more net jobs than all other states combined. Texas has attracted roughly one thousand American citizens, emigrating from other states, each day for the past several years — and also attracts a tremendous share of foreign immigrants to boot. Texas has had a lower unemployment rate than the nation for over five years. Texas has more Fortune-500 company headquarters than any other state except California — and it’s tied with California. Texas has a remarkably diversified economy and is America’s top manufacturing state.

So, Texas is big, and Texas matters. This is one thing Gail Collins gets right.

More the pity, then, what Collins gets wrong in not establishing the contention in her title — namely, “How the Lone Star State Hijacked the American Agenda.” Much ink is spilled relating things done by the Presidency of notable Texan George W. Bush, and by various other Texans elected to go to Washington, D.C. Collins is entirely correct that these are nationally significant people — Phil Gramm, Sam Rayburn, Lyndon Baines Johnson, Tom DeLay —who do nationally significant things. But she never makes a convincing case that they’re doing anything more or less than other men from other states in national government have done or would like to do. The author muses at length on the slow-motion train wreck of the federal No Child Left Behind Act of 2001, and presents it as a uniquely Texan disaster: yet no one genuinely familiar with the Act or its ideas could fail to note the indispensable role played in its drafting and passage by the late Massachusetts Senator Ted Kennedy. Was this a Bay State hijacking of the American agenda? Were the Reagan years a Californian hijacking of the American agenda? Are we of the Obama years, replete with Chicagoland policy and politics writ national, living under an Illinoisan hijacking of the American agenda? Collins doesn’t say.

This is the pity of Gail Collins on Texas. For all the remarkable things about Texas and Texans now, she fails to meaningfully contend with any of them. The informed reader is left to wonder: if the American agenda really were hijacked by Texas, wouldn’t the country be producing jobs, attracting immigrants, and economically expanding at a brisk clip? Left-wing pundits briefly grappled with this question in the fleeting weeks of Texas Governor Rick Perry’s Presidential-campaign ascendancy, but were never really compelled to arrive at a good answer. Collins doesn’t even try. That’s a shame, because if there is a good left-of-center critique of Texas, it deserves a hearing. The reader seeking that will have a wait a bit longer.

“Sometimes,” writes Gail Collins, “Texas’s most important export is not oil but irony.” In this, at least, she is right: with “As Texas Goes,” the Lone Star State delivers.

 

COMMENTS

  • trutexan

    Not much to see at the Alamo? Really? Spoken by a snooty liberal. Maybe she would think of it differently if she knew that the relic has been managed completely by women and is the largest tourist draw in the state. Liberals like her admire stuff done without men, right? The Daughters of the Republic of Texas only recently agreed to allow the state to begin managing it. Santa Anna was a butchering dictator and when he finished murdering 185 Texians ath the Alamo, he made his way to Goliad to butcher Col Fannin and 344 of his men. Not much to see? Only not much to see if you’re someone with no sense of or appreciation for history and the fight for freedom from the tyrrany of Mexico.

    Erick, you got my dander up. I’m considering my first book burning but I don’t want to waste my money. Somebody give that woman a Shiner beer, a scoop of Blue Belle’s Summer Strawberry Pie ice cream, and introduce her to a cowboy. She’ll come around.

    • funwithknives

      masquerading as ‘serious, studious journalism’, only puts one more countless nail into The Coffin That Is Progressivism.{Organically grown, pesticide-free wood, of course, and the tree had a name}

      The above commentor was obviously never contacted by this Collins-Person and more’s the pity.

      ‘Two-Sided Pages’ are no longer even entertained by the Left.

      Please, if you all would be so kind, Examine ‘Zombie’s’ review {see P J Media} of a recent pile of rendered wood chips called ‘The Little Blue Book’.
      The review goes on in some detail about Progressivism and why it it so resistant to anything labeled ‘Factual’.
      I’m going to get one and add it to my Alinsky pile of dead trees.

      Got to read it in small doses, don’t want to shoot blood outa’ my tear ducts…….

    • Mensch

      Ms. Collins failed to visit the basement at the Alamo.

      http://youtu.be/cYfjq3ZYZbA

  • Joliphant

    My sympathies to you for having to wade through it

  • jakee308

    at your comparison of her book to a Muppets movie.

    Which do you think came first?

    Oh wait, they’re both written by leftist parasites who believe they’re relevant/funny so who could really tell.

    One thing you have to love about Gail (and the Muppets); the predictability.

  • audax

    …or “Not Texan by birth,but by choice”. I really miss Texas, but still vote there absentee…..yes voted for Cruz already in the run-off….

    Knew I was going to love Texas the first time I crossed the border and saw this sign:

    Drive Friendly, The Texas Way”….

    • checkmate2012

      Do tell, meant in a friendly way truely.

      • audax

        …Michigan. Was a Reagan delegate in ’76 at GOP National Convention in KC, Some nice folks (Frannie Chiles, Barbara Howell, and Pat Jacobsen) from Texas invited me down. Had found memories of USAF days in San Antonio so headed down!

        • checkmate2012

          n/t

  • cwfoster

    I joined the US Navy in 1992, and due to family concerns, mustered out in Virginia in 2008. After a couple of bouts with unemployment, I find myself in the deep blue black hole of the Peoples Republik of Maryland. Wish I could afford to move back home! (I may yet find a way!)

  • merrie7137

    Do you know how hard it must have been for her to right a whole entire book without being able to throw in that Mitt Romney put his dog on the roof of the car? She can’t even get through a weekly column without dredging that up.

    On a side note, I can’t believe the studio heads let Jason Siegel ruin the Muppet movie like that. I read interviews before it was released where they praised the studio for giving them such a free reign. Maybe they shouldn’t have.

    Let’s hope the next Muppet movie is better and not disgraced by a recycled plot, political stereotyping and Sarah Silverman.

  • spook

    Seem like every time a lib. writes a book they violate the above rule by opening their mouths and proving they are fools.

  • ctpsb

    As a native Texan I hadn’t even heard of her until this post.

    Don’t get me wrong her low quality authorship should have a light shone on it though.