California’s legislature has a new style.

Ever seen a doll naked? Well, from now on, that’s how people look, too. At least it is, according to Senate Judiciary Committee Chair Hannah-Beth Jackson. The state politician announced Thursday that only “gender neutral” pronouns will be allowed during committee hearings.

So if you’re elected to the Golden State’s senate, suddenly you’ve got the same genitals as a Cabbage Patch Kid.

You doll, you!

Hannah-Beth dumbed it up real good:

“Our first order of business is to approve the committee rules. I’d like to note: In respecting the fact that we are now a state recognizing the non-binary designation as a gender, “he” and “she” — we are now merging them so we are using what my grammar teacher would have had a heart attack over: We are using the phrase ‘they’ and replacing other designations, so it’s a gender neutral designation: ‘they.’ Basically, that’s the primary reforms and revisions to the committee rules.”

If she thinks her grammar teacher woulda had a coronary, imagine the effect on her science teacher.

She then corrected the official record:

“In the spirit of gender neutrality for the rules of this committee, we now designate the chair as ‘they.'”

She continued with a pronouncement of world change:

“The world is a different place. My grammar teacher is long gone, and we won’t be hearing from her — from them! From they!”

Is it just me, or is her obsession with the death of her grammar teacher disturbing?

Of course, in reality, the natural world hasn’t changed; if it had, Hannah-Beth’s declaration wouldn’t be newsworthy. In the real world, there are still only two sexes. Anything else is just marketing. You’re welcome to market yourself as you wish; but a Kitty Carryall you ain’t.

-Alex

 

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