In the mood for a poem? I’m not.
But here’s one, courtesy of Beto O’Rourke. It’s from 1988, and Beto wrote it while in the hacking group “Cult of the Dead Cow.”
As RedState’s Brandon Morse covered previously, he also wrote murder fantasies. But here’s a real humdinger of a rhyme just in time for that special someone, on the occasion of an anniversary or just to let them know you care.
Don’t just read it; feel it.
Interpret as you wish:
I need a butt-shine,
You are holy,
Oh, sacred Cow
I thirst for you,
Buff my b*lls,
Love the Cow,
Good fortune for those that do.
Love me, breathe my feet,
The Cow has risen.
Wax my a**,
Scrub my b*lls.
The Cow has risen,
Oh, Milky wonder, sing for us once more,
Live your life, everlusting joy.
Thrust your hooves up my analytic passage,
Enjoy my fruits
Provider of Cheese and other wonderful dairy products,
We will cleanse your inner intestines.
We will bathe in your Pungent Odor,
Count my eyes,
Smell my skin,
Love the Scarecrow and the Milkman.
I live only for eternity,
Thirst for the undrinkable.
Hold the heat,
Praise the dough boy at the pizza shop.
Love the Oxen dung!
Thus spake SuperBeto, 2020 presidential candidate.
Breathe his feet.
Relevant RedState links in this article: here.
Find all my RedState work here.
Thank you for reading! Please sound off in the Comments section below. For iPhone instructions, see the bottom of this page.
If you have an iPhone and want to comment, select the box with the upward arrow at the bottom of your screen; swipe left and choose “Request Desktop Site.” If it fails to automatically refresh, manually reload the page. Scroll down to the red horizontal bar that says “Show Comments.”