Flat Earth International is Holding a Conference, & They're Doing it the Most Dangerous Way Possible

 

 

Wanna go on a cruise?

I got just the thing for ya.

In 2020, the Flat Earth International Conference is gettin’ together to float arou– I mean, across this square and have a grand ol’ scientific time.

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According to the group’s website, the extravaganza’s gonna be “the biggest, boldest, best adventure yet.”

Man — I love it when it’s the biggest and boldest.

And not only will you bask in the bigness, you’ll test a theory.

As per Live Science:

The goal [is to] test so-called flat-Earthers’ assertion that Earth is a flattened disk surrounded at its edge by a towering wall of ice.

Reeeeeeelly nice.

Will they get lost? There does seem to be a small snag, as noted by The Guardian:

Ships navigate based on the principle that the Earth is round,” former cruise ship captain Henk Keijer told The Guardian. “Nautical charts are designed with that in mind: that the Earth is round.”

Keijer indicated that the flat-earth idea ain’t big among the seafarin’ folk:

“I have sailed two million miles, give or take. I have not encountered one sea captain who believes the Earth is flat.”

But what do they know? Flat Earthers have been chompin’ at the bit to drop some science:

[T]he Flat Earth Society asserts that “the evidence for a flat earth is derived from many different facets of science and philosophy.”

“The simplest is by relying on one’s own senses to discern the true nature of the world around us,” the group states on its website. “The world looks flat, the bottoms of clouds are flat, the movement of the Sun; these are all examples of your senses telling you that we do not live on a spherical heliocentric world.”

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Need more reason to attend the boating bonanza? Featured speakers will include:

  • Mark Sargent of Enclosed World
  • Bob Knodel of Globebusters
  • Matt Long of WokeTown

If you go can score a ticket to get woke and bust the globe, be sure and let me know how it goes — IF you make it back.

Just in case the Conference is correct, ya might wanna take a raft.

And above all, confirm one very important thing: the ship’s ability to quickly shift into Reverse.

-Alex

 

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