More News Leaks from the Set of the Woke James Bond Film, and Traditionalists Aren't Going to Like James's Wife

 

 

We’re steadily learning more about the upcoming Bond movie, No Time to Die.

And the franchise’s move toward a more modern iteration may leave some traditionalists shaken and stirred.

According to reports by The Daily Mail, Mr. Bond will get married.

And what woman out there wouldn’t want to be the Mrs. Bond?

That’d be character Dr. Madeleine Swann — the very woman he marries.

As it turns out, macho man James chooses a girl who refuses to take his name.

It seems a bit uncharacteristic of Sean Connery’s double-O Alpha.

But that’s the breaks in this woke world.

Here’s the Mail:

The script has Bond marrying Dr Madeleine Swann — the psychologist played by French actress Lea Seydoux who first appeared in 2015’s Spectre. But she refuses to take her new husband’s name. The morning after their wedding, Bond wakes sleepy-eyed and says “Good morning, Mrs. Bond,” to which she replies: “Don’t you mean Ms. Swann?”

Wouldn’t they have discussed it previously?

Apparently not, and actress Lea Seydoux’s Bond girl ain’t no slave to the patriarchy.

In fact, she’s no Bond girl at all: As per a source intimate with the production, those sexy ladies no longer exist:

‘The phrase ‘Bond girl’ was outlawed from the set. The women in this film are all strong, brave and fiercely independent. These women are not helpless girls who jump into bed with Bond – their reactions are very different from what people might think.”

I ask, at this point, what I believe is a sensible question: Would anyone, male or female, want to be married to someone who’s “fiercely independent”? It seems that would be a recipe for divorce.

Although, to be fair, so would any marriage to James Bond.

Anyway, back to the movie — girls aren’t falling for that whole heterosexual attraction thing anymore:

“Bond tries his usual seduction techniques but they fail miserably. It’s very funny.”

And those of us in the audience are gonna find out more about the personal issues of the series’ women. Maybe it’ll be like The Spy Who Loved Me meets a Lifetime reality show:

[Actress Lashana Lynch], 31, said of her double-O role: “Everyone was really responsive to having her be what I wanted. You’re given a fresh perspective on a brand-new black woman in the Bond world.”

She was determined her character should be a “real” woman “who has issues with her weight and maybe questions what’s going on with her boyfriend.”

So guys, bring your fiercely independent gals. Unless, of course, they won’t come — because they’re fiercely independent.

But if they’re on the fence, maybe you can convince them with this tidbit, which I described last week:

There was even talk of the monumental scene you’ve all been waiting for — think back to 50+ years of Bond movies…remember that moment you always wished you’d see, but never did…your time may finally have come, compliments of Lashana and [screenwriter Phoebe Waller-Bridge]:

“We had one conversation about her maybe being on her period in one scene, and maybe at the beginning of the scene — and I spoke to [director Cary Joji Fukunaga] about this — throwing her tampon in the thing.”

Get ready for the next installment of everyone’s favorite gunman with a license to kill — but not to force the patriarchy on incredibly strong, monumentally brave women who don’t need a man — April 8th, 2020.

-ALEX

 

Relevant RedState links in this article: here.

See 3 more pieces from me:

The BBC Fixes Your Childhood: ‘The War Of The Worlds’ Gets Woke Up And Rewritten. A New Antagonist: Religion

An 80’S Children’s Cartoon Hit Gets Rebooted And Newly Woke With Gay And Nonbinary Characters

Enough To Make The Woke Wet Themselves: Hollywood’s Joe Rogan Rules The Gun Range In An Awesome New Video

Find all my RedState work here.

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