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Are you afraid of wasps? They’re everywhere. They live in clusters. Some are social while others are solitary. They play no role in pollination, and some are parasites.

They’ve got a fierce sting, especially the females.

I’m talking, of course, about White Anglo-Saxon Protestants.

And since those things bug a whole lot of people, a school in Virginia is considering #Canceling the critter.

As reported by Young America’s Foundation, Emory & Henry College may swat down the wasp as its mascot due to the winged wretch’s unfortunate association with white people. Of English descent. Who believe in Jesus. But aren’t Catholic.

Maybe they could just change it to the Atheist Wasps?

#DoneAndDone

As it stands, per administrative emails obtained by YAF, the nested nuisance may be about to meet RAID: Revolt Against an Insidious Demographic.

Communication from Alumni Director Monica Hoel reveals the “little wasp itself isn’t offensive, but the acronym WASP stands for White Anglo-Saxon Protestant.” Therefore, she says, “it sort of cuts both way: [sic] it stands to make us seem exclusive of those not in that category…and I mostly Hear [sic] it used as an insult against people who do fall into that category.”

Continuing:

“Like an interview this weekend where they described someone as WASPy: I don’t think it mean she was terribly cool or open minded! 🙂 It’s a pickle, for sure.”

Young America’s Foundation writer Kara Zupkus isn’t impressed:

The college’s mascot is clearly in reference to a wasp — the literal insect, not a White Anglo-Saxon Protestant. This school’s administration is seeking out any and all reasons students may be offended by something. A bug seems like it should be the least of their worries.

In another email, school President John Wells notes thusly:

“Conversations must examine how Emory & Henry’s past has contributed to current and ongoing systemic oppression. For example, discussion should be renewed regarding College’s mascot, the wasp, and the impact of this mascot on inclusion and diversity on our campus.”

Is that the look of systemic oppression? There’s been tremendous talk of such lately, but no one seems to be pointing to particular mechanisms. Is the depiction of winged hymenopterous insects hurting America?

The problematic pests certainly aren’t helping in the fat-shaming department — talk about an unrealistically narrow waist.

Regardless, if you attend Emory and Henry College and you’re plagued to biblical proportion — not by locusts but WASPs — just sit back and relax to serene thoughts of non-white, apple-shaped agnostics.

Good news, my friend: Your problem may soon be exterminated.

And if it doesn’t buzz off, how about students and faculty just agree the mascot represents something every modern mind should embrace — as the 80’s heavy metal band of the same name taught us, W.A.S.P. stands for We Are Sexual Perverts.

(For another option, see my headline.)

-ALEX

 

 

 

See 3 more pieces from me:

Foul Bawl? The Cleveland Indians Toss Around a Name Change

The Great Terry Crews Gets Shipwrecked Over His Tweet Calling All Children of God His Brothers and Sisters

To Fight Racism, Johnson & Johnson Will No Longer Make Skin-Lightening Products

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